Will Kobayashi Fall this Fourth?

Independence Day means fireworks, barbecues, American flag apparel, and yes, competitive eating. What's more American than dipping hot dogs in water and shoving them down your throat until you puke? I think George Shea, co-founder of the International Federation of Competitive eating was right when he said that "competitive eating is the battleground upon which God and Lucifer waged war for men's souls." The question looming in the minds of many Americans this weekend will be if 5'7 131 pound Takeru Kobayashi will return to Japan for the fifth year in a row as the world's best hot dog eater. Since we are the world's most obese nation, I feel that it is only appropriate that an American win Nathan's Famous hot dog eating competition this year. Our country's best hope for defeating Kobayashi is 420 pound subway driver Eric Booker. Booker claims that he was able to eat 41 hot dogs earlier this year, but skeptics feel that he is no match for Kobayashi, who set the world record by eating 53.5 dogs in last year's competition. While many Americans choose to relax and vacation this weekend, Booker will be restless, knowing that the hopes and dreams of a nation lie on his brawny shoulders. Good luck Mr. Booker, our country depends on you.