Waterson "Crushed"

(A disappointed Waterson has fallen into a downward spiral of booze and bad Nixon impersonations)

Yesterday's announcement that Samuel Alito Jr. will replace Harriet Miers on President Bush's SCOTUS wish list took quite the toll on television actor and fake prosecutor, Sam Waterson. Waterson, who has starred in the hearts and minds of the American people as an actor on NBC's Law and Order for the past thirty years, had high hopes of getting the nod from President Bush. His hopes were a direct result of the buzz created by my last post.

Waterson's judicial philosophy has been steady over his career. His belief is that in the criminal justice system the people are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the police, who investigate crime and the district attorneys who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories (enter fat, jazzy bassline). However, Waterson's credentials lack in comparison to those of conservative Judge Alito who has been described as the anti-Miers (is this because he's circumcised and she isn't?) Waterson was quoted stating that he was "crushed and disappointed" that he will not replace retiring Justice Sandra Day O'Connor on the highest court in the land, but that he will continue to try cases ripped from the headlines on behalf of the people of NYC.

The staff here at Pick's Post is upset as well, mostly because we placed a fifty dollar wager in Vegas that Waterson would be the nominee. But don't worry because we're hoping to recover our losses on the bet we placed on Jimmy Smits to win the 2008 Presidential election.