Snow in DC NIB

(above: an example of why ESL entrepreneurs should run the name of their proposed establishments by friends who are more familiar with penile-terminology)

President Bush made a trip to North Carolina yesterday to tell the country that the economy is better than you think and that the "Best days are yet to come." Next on the President's schedule is a stop in Iowa where he will tell the country that Sigfreid and Roy aren't in love and that Justin Timberlake is half black.

Texas lawmaker and former House Majority Leader Tom Delay will face trial for money laundering early next year. The conspiracy charge against Delay was thrown out by a judge yesterday, but that didn't seem to help the polls in Delay's district that indicate Delay would lose in the 2006 elections. According to pollsters, Texans said that they couldn't trust a man whose money smelled like Snuggle.

Jennifer Aniston is pretty upset about a paparazzi photo of her boob. Aniston has threatened to sue the boobie-bandit whose lense caught her topless while posing for the upcoming issue of GQ. In other news, it seems that my work computer doesn't allow the search term "Aniston+naked+boobie."

China has confirmed another human case of bird flu. As this situation seems to worsen, I have to ask one question...why won't the the Chinese stop having sex with birds?

In other news, this dog (may it rest in peace) still makes me want to throw up.